2012

Resolutions for 2012.

I got's them.

I could rattle off a list of the things I need to get better at doing this year by the bucket loads - like actually getting thank you cards out on time, for once. Or finally losing the weight I gained *cough* almost 2 years ago when I was pregnant. I could talk about my wish to travel to someplace I haven't been this year, my desire to learn the play the ukulele legitimately or finally kick my fear of toilet snakes (they are real people!) I could make the promise right now that I WILL take Sully bowling this year, that we will make more time for family camping trips and that I'll start going to bed earlier and stop surviving on 5 hours of sleep. How I promise this is the year we finish painting the house and finally decide on a color for our master bedroom, that I'll get better about seeing friends ... being on time ... breathing more ...

The list goes on

and on

and

on.

But the one I'm most excited about this year is this. My BIG resolution this year is to incorporate two purposefully planned preschool curriculum activities in our home, per week, and document it, on here, so I can hold myself accountable ... or look totally stupid as I fail trying.

I've spent the past couple weeks reading up on Waldorf and Montessori inspired teaching curriculum's - and needless to say, I feel inspired. Not so much to do their thing, but to bring back my own. I need doing this like I need a hole in my head, especially since he goes to school three days a week - learns a lot and loves it ... after that whole crying through the entire morning thing. Then he loves it.

I juggle working and a family just like everybody else. I have a never ending stack of laundry in my house and dishes that never seem to stop mating with each other and breeding more little dishes every time I turn my back. I struggle to get us all out the door on time in the mornings, dinner on the table at a reasonable hour or an adult conversation in with my husband every now and again that doesn't involve yelling over a screaming half naked toddler wielding a hockey stick throughout our house. I live for the day I don't pass out on my couch at 9:30 PM on a Friday. It would be so, so completely easy to just power down and throw on a movie for him every night while I go around looking for where I left my sanity ... but I don't want that. Not for me. Not for him. I want those days to be the exception, not the rule in our house. I know that there will come a day where he'll want nothing to do with me - a place where friends and sports and girls and sleeping override the coolness of parents. I guess I figure I'll just go hunting for my sanity then.

I don't want to be a back seat parent to his learning. And I guess my point is this: I don't have a lot of free time. If I am capable of pulling this off, then anybody is.

I'm not looking to break my bank, but I also don't have the kind of resources readily available like I use to when I taught. I am looking for thrifty, inexpensive ways to incorporate NEW learning centers/activities for us. Everything I plan on doing will be done at/in/around our house. So, here I go ... throwing up a Hail Mary and ...

Coming Soon ...

A DIY light table to be used for future art and science projects

Science: Ocean animals

Art: Truck paint

Sully lately

Long over due my little man to let you know everything you've been up to lately!

You're not a fan of eggs.

You sleep talk a lot.

You love helping at self checkouts.

You say "Huh?" a lot, and it kind of drives me crazy. I hate it.

You always start laughing when you fake cry because you suck at it.

You know all your shapes, even what a hexagon is! You once corrected me when I said something was a circle and you told me that it was in fact a oval. I didn't even know you knew what a oval was!

You're an observer. You pick up things extremely quick.

You're sensitive.

You get jealous around other babies. Having a sibling should be real interesting when the time comes.

You like Adele, Amy Whinehouse, Jack Johnson, The Jackson 5, Edward Sharpe, Zac Brown Band, Creedence Clearwater and Passion Pit to name a few bands. Clearly your taste in music is as eclectic as your daddy and my own.

You know all your colors.

You think coffee milk in regular milk heated up is coffee. I wonder sometimes what our neighbors think when you yell "Mom! I need my coffee!"

You think you know Kung Fu,

One of your favorite places to go is the SB Zoo. You insist they have zebras and we just have never found them. They don't.

I'm pretty sure you think our second home is Target.

You have a dimple under your eye that comes out when you smile. Its my favorite.

Your hair grows like your Daddy's, fast.

You're extremely tall for your age. People usually think you're a late 3 or 4 year old.

You laugh, a lot.

You try to make jokes when you're in trouble.

You think the 1989 Mario Bros. show is "cool". I don't have the heart to tell you. You do The Mario and it makes me crack up. I hope one day its your signature move on the dance floor. Do The Mario, do The Mario.

You take to music and pick up songs FAST. You remember a song after hearing it maybe only a couple times. You've started singing songs to yourself a lot (Something I do too.)

You live for hockey. You'd play it all day if we would let you. You play it with daddy on the xbox, with your hockey set in the house or outside, at the park, air hockey, on our phones, on the TV. You can name a good amount of players. Your favorite players are Jack Johnson and Anze Kopitar. You even know the players numbers and live in your hockey jerseys. All you talk about is taking skating lessons when you turn 3 and the ice rink daddy takes you to to watch the big kids play. ("I take skating lesson when I turn 3, so I can play like the big boys!")

You still sleep in our bedroom. You still use a paci. You still only sit on the potty when you want to. They are all works in progress. We're learning there is no such thing as making/bribing you to do something that you don't want to do. You're hard-headed like that.

Your favorite shoes are your converse stars or your rain boots.

You love hats.

Your favorite color is purple (Like the Kings. What a surprise!)

Your favorite food is beans and rice and pot roast with potatoes. You also love cheese.

Your favorite vegetables are carrots.

Your favorite fruits are bananas, apples, blueberries, avocados & strawberries.

You have a minor allergy to peanut butter and possibly nuts in general.

You can turn on, load, and navigate yourself around a laptop and phone. You know exactly where to go to get into the games or videos. You also like going through the picture folders.

You're funny and you know it. You have the comedic timing and sarcasm like an adult. We're in trouble.

You don't high five, you bump fists.

You don't cry when you get hurt usually. You're pretty tough. We always know you really are hurt when the tears come.

You like washing dishes.

You clench your fists when you sleep, something you've done since you were born.

You like putting soft things in your ears. We have no idea why.

The first thing you do at home or your grandparents house is take off your pants. It doesn't matter how long we're staying. The pants come off.

You love camping.

You love cars and trains.

You aren't scared of the dark.

You can write the number 11.

You can count to 30

You like to hug, kiss and hang on people when you get tired.

You can spell your name.

You prefer to be called Sullivan over Sully when asked or given the option.

You love to read. You have a handful of books that you can recite back to us.

You're pretty great about saying please and thank you.

You don't have a whole lot of interest in art right now, although you've started to get into drawing "faces".

You hate things on your hands IE: dirt, paint, chalk, sand, markers or anything sticky.

You're fascinated with chap stick.

Your favorite toy this Christmas was the Buzz Lightyear life size action figure your daddy got you.

You're pretty good at puzzles.

You're sassy most of the time, but extremely sweet when you want to be.

You like to cuddle, hold my hand and give hugs for no reason. You're definitely a Mama's Boy still and I'm totally okay with that.

The only blankets you'll sleep with have to be the fuzzy kind.

You're obsessed with making angry, silly faces and your eyebrows these days.

You like playing baseball and football. You're pretty good at catching.

You're shy.

You're very polite to other people, usually.

You give the best hugs.

You wear a size 9 shoe, a 3T-4T shirt and 3T long pants.

You weigh about 36-38 lbs. Every time you start to gain weight you immediately go through a growing spurt. I'm not sure how tall you are these days, but its more than half of your Yaya's total height. You're tall.

You love your daddy. You lay on his chest when you watch hockey together. He's also your personally jungle gym which I'm sure is going to require some PT down the line.

I let you dress yourself when you want. Like the night we picked up your daddy from the airport and you wore thermal animal pj leggings, a orange shirt, a football hoodie, your Kings jersey on top with a striped hat and frog rain boots. Or the time we went to Target and you were in brown plaid shorts with a striped shirt, two different colored socks, your lime green crocs and dragon hat. One time you wore lime green and orange shorts with a suspender shirt, your fedora hat and monster vans. I think its adorable. It reminds me of your Yaya.

You like having sleepovers at your Nini and Papa's house.

You love their dog Snickers more.

Yaya and B's dog Cash ate a gingerbread train you made. Its been a month later and you still relive that day.

People always comment on how helpful you are.

You have my eyes and your daddy's wide smile.

You like preschool even though the mornings are still a little rough.

You have natural rhythm and love instruments. You tap your foot to a beat. Its pretty awesome to see, especially coming from a musical background.

You like spicy food, especially salsa.

You're not very patient. You get frustrated easily.

You hate band-aids.

The only diaper brand you'll wear is Luvs. You freak out if we try to put anything else on you.

You don't like pull ups. You once came home in a princess pull up from school because you're awesome mom forgot your diapers that day, and ever since then, you've refused to wear pull ups at home. I'm pretty sure the pink "underwear" emotionally scarred you. You were so embarrassed that day!

You sing and dance and watch yourself in the mirror.

You're dramatic.

More than one person has said we need to get you into acting. You're very animated.

You've been to the movie theatre 3 times - Kung Fu Panda 2, Cars 2 and Puss in Boots. You did great every time.

You love dogs. You aren't scared of them at all. You like all animals but you really love dogs. You call Murphy Lu "Woo-wie". It's totally adorable.

You like sucking on lemons. We don't let you do it a lot though.

You're sour face is hilarious. You say "Its sour!" with a face anytime you don't want to eat something, even when its impossible for it to be sour.

You surprise us and keep us on our toes everyday!

Some funny things you've said in the past couple months ...

• Sleep talking: "No! I'm not funny!" (Raspberries the air and crashes out cold back onto pillow)

• Sleep talking: "Hey, don't sell me the cheese!"

• Sleep talking "I'm having a hockey dream."

• (Humming Fox sports tune) "Kings hockey, brought to you by, Jack-In-The-Box."

• "I can't eat dinner, I HAVE to do this!" (Gets down from table and proceeds to karate kick the air)

• "I can't do it, I'm sick. (Me - "You're not sick.") Well then I'm too little!"

• "Mom, just drive. (Me- "I can't, there is a car ahead of us.") Well then just crash into him."

• "Have you seen my harmon-ka? (Daddy - "Your what?") MY HARMON-KA! MY HARMON-KA! It goes, wooooot." (Me - "You mean your harmonica?") "YES! I said Harmon-ka."

• (At a restaurant and clearly crabby/agitated) "I said I wanted a burger damn it! I mean darn-it. I said darn-it."

• "Wait, we can't go. I didn't see any cows. (Us - "Cows?) Yeh, cows. They say moo. I didn't see them at the farm. (Us - "Sully we're at the Farmers Market, not The Farm.") Oh. No cows? I don't see no cows today then."

• "I'm looking for money in your purse. (Me - "Why?) I need money for my pig! My pig bank. Do you have dollars?"

At the park with Mommy and Yaya, playing what else ...

hockey!

A Scut Farkus kind of Christmas

"Oh, life is like that.

Sometimes, at the height of our revelries, when our joy is at it's zenith -

When all is most right with the world,

the most unthinkable disasters descend upon us."

- A Christmas Story

This Christmas definitely had the potential to be the ugly red-headed bully of them all. A F-dash-dash-dash kind of holiday. A C+, you'll shoot your eye out, leg lamp breaker - end of year send out.

On the morning of the Sunday before last, December 18th, we received a horribly unexpected phone call. Shaun's step-mom, my father-in-law John's wife, passed away suddenly. With no warning. With no sign. She simply, was just gone. Without hesitation we started looking for the quickest flight we could get Shaun on so he could get to Texas. He left Wednesday morning and returned late last night. Our hearts are still with them in Texas, and I think they will be for a long time. Its still hard to wrap our heads around the fact that she's gone. I still can't believe it.

Since we were at LAX last night picking up Shaun, it obviously means he wasn't home for the holidays. And while I cried more than my fair share every time "I"ll be home for Christmas" came on the radio during the week, I cried more about the shitty circumstances of why he wasn't home. I cried for my brother-in-law. I cried for my father-in-law. For my husband. For Helen - a wonderful, no shit kind of person who loved her family dearly and shouldn't be gone. For my son who will now only ever know his Grandma Texas through all of us. I cried because the box of gifts and pictures Sully hand picked and drew for his grandparent's and uncle sat in my car all week as I drove around everywhere, unsure of what to do with them. I cried that we'll never see her again - that I had to explain what dying was to my two year old son. Thanks Lion King for assisting me on that one. (Sully: Daddy went on a plane to Texas. Grandpa was sad. Me: Do you understand why Grandpa was sad? Sully: Because Grandma died-ed. Like Simba's Daddy. Sully is sad like Simba. Me: Cue tears.) I know some people disagree about me being truthful with my son in regards to everything that happened this week. Without giving some long explanation about why I handled it the way I did I will say this - I did what was best for my son. He needed to know it was okay to feel sad, to feel a little hurt, to understand why Mommy was pissed off at the universe for a couple days. While I would never give him more than what I feel he is capable of processing and understanding, I will never be anything but truthful with him when its asked of me.

After a couple days Sully and I unpacked the Christmas box that should have been in Texas. We hung the ornaments Sully picked for everyone on our tree this year. When the time is right we'll send Grandpa John and Uncle Matt theirs. We've decided to keep Grandma Helen's castle ornament. It found a deserving place on our tree and it just feels right to keep something Sully was so excited about giving her. It allows for him to have a small way and reason to connect with the fact she was once here, and she loved him. I think that's important, to all of us.

Shaun got home safe and things will start to get back to normal, whatever that really means anyways. Our Christmas was postponed to this week, which is probably just as well since Sully came down with the flu Friday morning and just yesterday started feeling better.

Sully and I along with my two dogs attempted to spend Christmas Eve at my parent's after they called us while we were hanging out at Chuck-E-Cheese and insisted we couldn't spend it alone. About 3:30 that morning my mom came into the guest room where I was sleeping (Sully had crashed in their bed) saying he was running a pretty decent fever again. I tried for awhile to get him back to sleep, but he just kept crying he wanted to go home. Fast forward to 4:30 AM and I'm outside getting my dogs and kid BACK into the truck like some maniac fleeing a Christmas murder scene and driving us home while I sing the Christmas classic Livin' on a Prayer by Bon Jovi at the top of my lungs trying to stay awake. If you can't laugh, what can you do?

About the time everyone in CA was waking up to open presents, we were heading to bed, finally. My sister and her fiance brought us afternoon breakfast and hung out for awhile. They took Sully to the park so I could shower for the first time in almost a week in peace and make a few phone calls. We all headed back to my folks house where we had a Christmas feast of Del Taco drive through and watched a movie while my dad and mom kept Sully busy in the office. Every time someone would ask how I was I'd reply "Living the dream." and we'd laugh. It was a weird day, it was a weird week - but it could have always been worse. It had its moments. It was hard, in a lot of ways, but I'm never one to shy away from a challenge. Making lemonade out of lemons.

I'm looking forward to Christmas Part Deux this weekend. I have A Christmas Story on DVD ready to be played and then played again while we wrap Santa presents this Saturday evening. I have Santa cookies that are begging to be baked and reindeer food that's calling to be left outside for Santa's reindeer. The decorations are staying up, and thanks to the year-round holiday music on demand, the music isn't going away anytime soon either.

I'm learning - in so many ways - that life is what you make of it. You can either be a victim or a survivor. You can choose to cry or choose to laugh. You can feel sorry for yourself and those around you or you can do something about it. You can be the kind of person that just writes the whole thing off, or the kind of person that calls up North and asks to speak to the fat man in red and see if he can pull some string for you.

I choose to laugh.

I choose to be a favor caller.

A play-by-my-own-rules setter.

A make my own magic kind of gal.

Because life is short.

Because its the best way I know how to honor somebody.

I choose to make lemonade out of lemons, baby.

The wait. You have no idea how excited this child was. He just stood, danced and sat looking at this door for 20 minutes (the flight was delayed)

The payoff.

Thanks for getting him home safe you guys.

Christmas card 2011

Happy Holidays from the Curtis Family

Not quitting my day job anytime soon

Pretty sure I'd never make it as a professional ginger bread house decorator.

And neither would he.

Pretty sure he'd get fired for eating more candy than actually went onto the house.

The best explanation I can give to you right now

Dear Sully -

Did I ever tell you about,
the time Christmas waited?
The only one year
it was ever belated?

When Santa got word
He hung his head low
He shut down the assembly line
And sent every elf home.

He pushed his sleigh,
Back in to the shed
Dressed down to his skivvies -
Removed his coat of red

Even the reindeer
Were returned to their stalls
For this day didn't feel
Like Christmas time at all

With the entire North Pole
Silent as a mouse
He sat in his big chair
In his very silent house

The snowmen and gingerbread
Asked what they should do
Santa let out a sigh -
He nodded and knew.

After much deliberation
After much careful thought
He would give the gift
That cannot be bought

The elves and the reindeer
The snowmen agreed
The answer was quite simple
Quite simple indeed

So he gathered his workers
He made some tall orders
The elves in the workshop
They did what they 'oughta

They sent word down
To you in a snowflake letter
"Dearest Sully, Christmas will resume,
When you feel the time is better.

"See, I know there are places
Which my sleigh cannot reach
Just beyond the candy canes
The snow and the trees

And this is the part
Where I ask you to believe -
In what magic can do
In what it can achieve

To know love and togetherness
Can carry where we go
Even beyond the limits
Of which we do not know

The presents and cookies
Stuffed stockings can wait
The meaning goes with us wherever -
The day, well it's just a date.

For time is the greatest
Gift of them all
No matter how long
How short, big or small

You carry heavy hearts
But please remember to smile
Cheer will return,
Though, it may take awhile.

I'll wait for my cookies
And my favorite drink
As the signal to come back
When you're ready, you think."

And so my love
That's how this story goes
And when you're older
Someday you will know

That sometimes,
There are people so great
That even Christmas itself
Knows that it can wait.

You and Grandma Texas.
We're going to miss you dearly Helen. We love you.

Spreading the Christmas spirit ...

Every year we do something around this time. This year we decided to adopt a senior citizen, something we never have done before. My sister pitched in some awesome stuff from Bath & Body Works. The rest included just what they asked for - toiletries, makeup and a grocery gift card.

It was fun putting the box together, and I hope that whoever got it was happy to get it and has got some use out of the things they needed.